Wednesday, 21 September 2011

Crazy Going Slowly Am I

On Monday I had a playdate with two of my good friends and their two awesome little kids. While the kids drooled on blocks and tried to break out of the gates, we talked about the latest things we were grappling with. I find conversations with moms hilarious; we talk in the craziest circles, grazing over subjects because our brains seem to be newly wired for what I call "snack thinking". We simply don't have the kind of time we used to have, plus babies' attention spans are short, and in order to remain symbiotic I think we start to shorten our spans too. That's why I call it snacking.
What emerged in our conversation was a similar thread that all of us were feeling: stress. Stress over the little things, stress over when, what, how this would get done, that would be finished. Stress over packing a diaper bag, taking a shower, getting a meal made etc... We agreed that they were all small things which didn't matter all that much, but I found it interesting that we had been feeling the same way.
The next day I went to work for my three-hour stint at the bakery. My phone rang, someone texted, I started a spreadsheet, I checked my email, I texted back, I checked the cookies, I went back to the spreadsheet, I forgot to eat - and by the end of that three hours I truly wanted to rip my hair out. I got nothing done. I feel this way a lot of the time and find that it's a real challenge to get focused and accomplish something.
I am writing about it with the intention to bring some order into my somewhat chaotic existence.
My schedule is like a stop and go tornado. Not so different from my soon-to-be-a-toddler...
Here is a list of the things that make me crazy right now:
1) I don't eat properly. It's always lunch that gets missed, and this really affects my blood sugar and mood.
2) I feel like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly with the way I'm always texting, checking email, texting, checking email. I think Apple has kidnapped my brain.
3) My house is cluttered and disorganized.
4) I try to fit too much into one session at work and end up accomplishing very little.
5) Exercise always takes the backseat.
6) I always scramble to find something to wear in the mornings and it makes me feel like a bit of a schlump.
What I desire and crave and would drool over right now is having some kind of a schedule that I can stick to, and that isn't too ambitious. Why do I want this so bad? Why do the other moms I know want this? Why do most people thrive in this sort of condition? Because having just a little bit of control is nice. It makes me feel grounded, and sorted, and like I am taking care of myself.
So here's my list of solutions to get started with in response to the above crazy-makers.
1) Dedicate Sunday to meal planning and food shopping so that I can make a couple soups or stews for the week ahead. I do have a Crock Pot after all.
2) Choose specific times to check email and use phone. This is a hard one, but will help me to relax and focus.
3) De-clutter. Just get it done. Pick one area or one room at a time and move that s**t out!
4) Make a list when I arrive at work of the top 3 things I need to accomplish that day. Check them off as I go.
5) Make time to exercise. Seriously! Even 30 minutes every day.
6) Put my clothes out the night before.

Is this over-ambitious? I just want to find a flow, get into it, and feel as though I have some say in the way I feel day-to-day. Better to be on top of the wave than underneath it with a mouth full of sand.
xo BB
ps - the picture with this post is one I took while on my honeymoon in Big Sur. I want to feel how this photo feels.


Selena said...

Oh yea sister. You know you and I are in the same boat. Along with many other mama's out there. The good part tho - is that we ROCK, no matter what. Because somehow - we do end up getting it all done. But yes, it's nice to be less manic about it ;-)

JoKnows said...

This is definitely a common issue. I don't know if this helps, but my kids are six and nine now and things are much better/easier. I think your hormones are crazy after you have kids for a lot longer than we are led to believe. You get much more energy and enthusiasm back when they are older. I find rum and coke helps too :)

Baker Babe said...

Rum and coke. Hmm... I hadn't thought of that. Mother's little helper.

Mindy said...

Your ideas of how to handle the stress and get organized are pretty good! I have a similar list and work ethic as the days are crazy and I travel a lot for work. Now that you've been at it a few weeks, how is it going?

Just bought your cookies for the first time- AMAZING. Tried the chocolate chip, MoMints, and espresso, and will now be a regular customer. I don't eat wheat or white sugar as I'm training in a competitive martial art and have to be careful what I intake, so I'm super pleased to find your product!!!

Carol Devine said...

beautiful post Eden and the dec 28 one of your moment in the Canadian Tire revelation and Duran Duran. I have to laugh though because I misread 'put your clothes out the night before' as 'put your clothes on the night before' and i find that equally useful as long as it's not silk or linen. xxx keep up the great surviving and living and sharing, carol x